Friendship: Definitions galore..(Dedicated to all my friends)

Thinking of what it means, the first thing I did was what we do always- GOOGLE IT. The results were on expected lines, bordering to the extent of being repetitive. Some were different as well. Listing down some of them–

1) Friendship is the cooperative and supportive relationship between people, or animals ( Wikipedia definition)

2) Friendship is a personal relationship shared between two individuals for the welfare of other, in other words, it is the relationship of trust, faith and concern for each other feelings.( http://ezinearticles.com/?Definition-of-Friendship—A-Few-Facts&id=1267049)

3) Looking slightly philosophically, Friendship is the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring all right out just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful friendly hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping and, with a breath of comfort, blow the rest away.( http://www.xenodochy.org/ex/quotes/friendship.html)

4) Looking at some of the responses of a newspaper contest( http://www.successnet.org/scards/friendship.htm)

a) One who multiplies joys, divides grief and whose honesty is inviolable.”

b) One who understands our silence

c) A volume of sympathy bound in cloth,

AND THE WINNER WAS

A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out.

But as they say, all that is bookish ( or webbish now a days) seems so boring and out of fashion. So, what about some unique, out of the box definitions, more relevant in today’s world..

1) A friend is one, who is permanent guest in all your functions and many a times without functions, some times leading to suspicions on even your orientation.

2) A friend is one, who either does not drink in a pub, because he has to carry you back or drinks the most, as he knows you are there to carry him back.

3) A friend is one, who sits on the terrace braving the Delhi cold at 11 in the night to talk to you, because in one room, while TV is switched on in full volume and in drawing-room, the spouse/mother is waiting and shouting for dinner.

4) A friend is one, who always teases the girl next seat, knowing either his charm will work or you will escort him to safety.

5) A friend is one, who asks stupid questions during examinations, so that prof’s attention is diverted and you can cheat comfortably.

6) A friend is one, who goes to the red light area with you, and stops you from entering a brothel, because his love could not say no earlier and his concern will not let you do wrong eventually.

7) A friend is one, whose car you can borrow at any time of day, and then finally call him to say, as to how it has been badly smashed and he needs to come and arrange to transport it, as you are getting late.

The list is endless, but that is what friendship is all about as Aristotle said- “What is a friend? A single soul, dwelling in two bodies”

More definitions are solicited.

The hand which ensured food to millions is no more…

Norman Borlaug: Does the name ring a bell? If not, please google. I am sure you will finds tons and tons of articles on him. Known as the pioneer of Green revolution in Asian countries, he was the one who proved wrong the Malthusian nightmare that it will be impossible to feed the rising Indian population some four decades back.

Nobel peace prize winner in 1970, the committee introduced him as ” More than any other single person of this age, he has provided bread for this hungry world”, and he was widely described as father of Green revolution, something which he found miserable. It was last Saturday, when this great soul left for heavenly abode. 

But, what happened next is shocking. Perhaps the torn muscle of Virat Kohli and Viru’s ramp walk in Kolkata fashion week is more important. But, all I found the mention of this great loss was 1 one-liner on the sidelines in leading dailies. And I personally think media is not the only one to be blamed for it. Are we as individuals actually concerned? Does it really matter to us? Or we more interested in Big B’s gossip or the Shahrukh-Salman spat.  Media presents what ever it thinks junta is intersted in. And am sure, most people will ask.. WHO NORMAN? What did he do?

Guess it has become our habit.. “We forget the hands, which fed us. We are indifferent to what is happening around? We are becoming more and more self-centric and self-obsessed. The only things of interest left now are cricket, Bollywood and oneself. Rest all can take a backseat.”

May his soul rest in peace, and God bless him… This is all I can think in the end.

Joy of giving

Let me start the post with a harsh reality of life.. Its immaterial whether you go to office in a Merc or brace the local train crowd, or walk down to save those five rupees. No matter which category you belong to, your body will require the same space to rest in peace. I know it is easy said than felt, but the sooner you realize it, the more comfortable you are.

With the changing world, there is no end to materialistic comforts. Everyday, I read articles wherein people spend millions on a tattoo, or for their pet room. They fully deserve to do so, but can a thought be spared for the underpreveleged. As a Hindi poet had rightly said towards the social diaparity existing in our society.

“swano ko milta doodh bhat,
bhookhe bachche auklate hain,
ma ki haddi se chipak-chipak
jare ki raat bitate hain “

History has been witness to enormous incidents of people who have given more than any one could have imagined. Guess, it was joy of giving for the sage Dadhichi, who gave his bones for making Vajra. A similar exapme is of Karna, beautifully captured in the following lines of Rashmirathi by Ramdhari Singh Dinkar. The lines describe the episode when Karna had spared four Pandavas because he had promised Kunti the same.

”सब आंख मूंद कर लडते हैं, जय इसी लोक में पाने को ,
पर, कर्ण जूझता है कोई, ऊंचा सद्धर्म निभाने को ,
सबके समेत पंकिल सर में, मेरे भी चरण पडेंग़े क्या ?
ये लोभ मृत्तिकामय जग के, आत्मा का तेज हरेंगे क्या ?

यह देह टूटने वाली है, इस मिट्टी का कब तक प्रमाण ?
मृत्तिका छोड ऊपर नभ में भी तो ले जाना है विमान .
कुछ जुटा रहा सामान खमण्डल में सोपान बनाने को ,
ये चार फुल फेंके मैंने, ऊपर की राह सजाने को

ये चार फुल हैं मोल किन्हीं कातर नयनों के पानी के ,
ये चार फुल प्रच्छन्न दान हैं किसी महाबल दानी के .
ये चार फुल, मेरा अदृष्ट था हुआ कभी जिनका कामी,
ये चार फुल पाकर प्रसन्न हंसते होंगे अन्तर्यामी .”

”समझोगे नहीं शल्य इसको, यह करतब नादानों का हैं ,
ये खेल जीत से बडे क़िसी मकसद के दीवानों का हैं .
जानते स्वाद इसका वे ही, जो सुरा स्वप्न की पीते हैं ,
दुनिया में रहकर भी दुनिया से अलग खडे ज़ो जीते हैं .”

I, in no way, am promoting social loafing, and prpogating doing the extra bit. Also, I am saying is that if your small action can bring joy and smile to some face, please do the same. Look at your school books. At best, they will be in some cupboard, being dusted every year during Diwali/newyear. Did the thought of giving it to some needy student( he may be your own relative) cross your mind? It actually would have the best use for the book. 

To sum it up, if you are God fearing, just think, what will you say to God, when he asks that when you could have done certain things, why did you not do the same? For athiests, just try once. The mental satisfaction and peace which you get is unparalleled. Comments/Counterviews solicited.

Success has many fathers, failure is an orphan

Ramdhari Singh Dinkar, a hindi poet acknowledged the same in his following lines:

जग में जले जहाँ भी, नमन पुनीत अनल को,

जिस नर में भी बसे, हमारा नमन तेज को, बल को।

किसी वृन्त पर खिले विपिन में, पर, नमस्य है फूल,

सुधी खोजते नहीं, गुणों का आदि, शक्ति का मूल।

Looking mythologically, Karna seemed to have uttered the same words. Though the eldest son of Kunti, he was brought up by a low caste family, and had to bear the taunts of the world. But the same world thought highly of him when he emerged as one of the great warriors of his time. The following lines from of  Ramdhari Singh Dinkar) try to capture exactly the same.
“मैं हुआ धनुर्धर जब नामी,

सब लोग हुए हित के कामी

पर ऐसा भी था एक समय,

जब यह समाज निष्ठुर निर्दय

किंचित न स्नेह दर्शाता था,

विष-व्यंग सदा बरसाता था”

Looking at western history, there is a mention of the same in the year 1946 (La vittoria trova cento padri, e nessuno vuole riconoscere l’insuccesso. Victory has a hundred fathers, and no one acknowledges a failure.) Details of the same are available at http://www.answers.com/topic/success-has-many-fathers-while-failure-is-an-orphan.

In present world also, this old adage holds good. As long you delivers results, few delve into the details. A small blip, and the blood sucking vampire raises its head. No wonder, Kid of TAARE ZAMEEN PAR( A hindi movie, and a must watch)  have a horrible time adjusting to the world. Also, with even kids’ education becoming more and more competitive, where as small successes call for great celebrations, small misses also become a heart burn topic. Talking of Corporate world, its numbers which matter. Rest all can follow. However, in this mad rush, some forget even the very basics, which have such a profound effect that it is difficult to receover.( Else how will you explain seven loans on a single propoerty, the basic reason for Sub prime crisis).

 

But, then the history is also replete with examples which never let failures come their way. Solace for all those who are still walking the unconventional track

I Like walking in the rain, becasue no one can see my tears…

Guess the same words were echoed by poet Rahim

“Rahiman nij man ki vyatha, man hi rakho koi,

Sun ithlaiye log sub, Baant na lije koi”

Pause for a minute, take a deep breath, and think over it. Some one rightly asked me couple of days ago “How many people would be care, even if you die tomorrow?”. Sadly, I had no answers, and the list was so strong. In Bhagwad Gita, it is said that nothing is permanent sans the ATMAN.. The world is transient. Then why to look for shoulders to shed your tears..

Ravindra Nath Tagore once said “ YADI TOR DAAK SUNE KEU NA AASE TOBE EKLA CHOLO RE( If no one responds to your words, then walk alone)”. I question it the other way. Why ask only from someone?? I remenber the words of George Patton ” No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country. “  and was immediately tempted to draw an acronym ” No one ever made his mark by crying on others shoulders. He made it by making the other poor dumb cry on his shoulder”. May be I drew it too further. But may be, this thought is worth a mention as well.

To sum up. why expose yourself.. why expose your vulnerability.. Why give a chance to anyone.. Why let any one take due/undue advantage of the same? So, wait for rain, till you shed your next tear

DESTINY: IT OVERSHADOWS EVERYTHING…

Destiny.. Look one way.. Its just a word.. Look other way.. Its everything.. Its beauty lies in its unpredictiveness.. At times, you find comfort in its embrace, at times it is soothing, at times, it also comes out as nerve wrecking. They say destiny rarely smiles, and when it smiles, make the most of it.. But at times, its smile becomes a regular feature..

It is not an easy task to get it smiling, and it takes years before a hint of its smiles catches you somewhere..But some times you feel, its one smile drains out all your past toiling.. No wonder, a student prepares years for that coveted seat in the prestigious college, and one smile of destiny and its all his.. The joy on his face is beyond words..

Same is the case with a toiling farmer, when the months of his labour, when aptly supported by destiny, bears fruits in his fields, and a mere glance at it rejuvenates him for another year. People say” KHUDI KO KAR BULAND ITNA KI HAR TAQDEER SE PEHLE, KHUDA BANDE SE KHUD POOCHE, BATA TERI RAJA KYA HAI?” But is destiny so easy to be tamed? Perhaps no.. Ask those who had a bitter experience..

No wonder, like a tsunami, you never know, when you were hit by destiny.. You can feel its gentle nudge in a moving train, when all of sudden, you get everything, or may be in the lap of mother nature, when the serene surroundings bring out a pleasant surprise for you.. And how to forget the abode of God, when everything appears flowing from the almighty only..

I know, the post does not make sense, but that is the beauty of destiny.. If everything can be analyzed and inferred, what charm does it hold… Correct me, if I am wrong.. But any one of you who does not want its embrace, you are a liar…

Mumbai Terror Attacks: YES WE CAN

A confession before I begin: After reading the article, please don’t ask what I intend to communicate. It may make no sense, or some sense. No wonder, because after such audacious attacks, any ordinary mortal will have difficulty remaining sane.

Just recollecting few news highlights, one of the grenade that was lobbed and did not go off has the mark of Pakistan Territorial Army. Five calls were made to Karachi by the terrorists just before the attack. A mobile has fallen from the terrorist while lobbing a grenade. It is receiving constant calls from Pashtun area of Pakistan. Hotel sources also point to the behavior of terrorists very much like the neighbouring country natives. Is this the first incident? NO. Will it change anything? NO. Just a simple question.. ARE WE NOT FED UP OF PSEUDO WARS? IS IT NOT THE TIME TO SETTLE IT FOR ONCE AND ALL? I request the visitors to post their response about the same.9/11 esnured an entire country was demolished, with effects in parts of other countries as well. How many more 26/11s are needed in India, before we say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

Cut and the scenario changes to the charged political atmosphere. With five assembly elections in process and general elections round the corner, everyone is out to woo the voters. And if economic offerings were not enough, emotional and psychological areas are also being targetted aggressively. What has happened to wife and children of Insector Sharma? Does any one care? But some have cried hoarse about the Batla house encounter trying to raise the communal frenzy? Why, obviously for votes. Terror knows no religion, and we can easily pass these incidents as work of some frantic souls. Please remember, Nazism in Germany was also earlier passed off in the same vein, but what happened then is not a piece of imagination, but a historical reality. Today, when a son leaves for office in the morning, his parents don’t know whether he will be back or not,  and this is a bloody fact. The parliament attack mastermind plea for clemency is still pending. May an ordinary Indian know why? What more are we waiting for? What is stopping from us taking a firm stand? Why not iron fist? Why soft hands? Why not declare national emergency and clear the cancerous growth of the terrorism and naxalism for once and all?

1993 bomb blasts. The miscreants chose the sea route for bringing in lethal ammunition. 26/11 again same route was used. What were the security agencies doing? Or is the price of human life so cheap in India? Or 15 years were time enough to allow a serious lapse to happen again? I salute the matyrs of this proxy war, my heart beats for the brave souls who walk into the hail of bullets never sure of their next breath. Still Pay commission plays havoc with their sentiments. Still, they are given pea nuts, and the cream is reserved for Creme de Creme of the society.

India today is sick of dialogues like

THESE ARE ACTS OF DESPERATION,

NEIGHBOURING COUNTRIES HAVE A HAND IN THE DASTARDLY ACT.

WE REQUEST PEOPLE TO MAINTAIN PEACE

GUILTY WILL BE BOOKED SOON.

No wonder, we almost laugh hearing these statements now, as they don’t carry any meaning or significance. These are the only words they know when confronted for audio bytes by media.

In the recent past, In India, the terrorists have said umpteenth number of times YES WE CAN. High time, the country now stands together, bashes the political opportunists, and says YES WE CAN, and dare not mess with us.

Feelings of a ………………

I don’t know, why it happens,
But it does,
I don’t know, whether it happens to me only,
But to me, it does…
Pondering endlessly, Thinking aimlessly..
Staring into endless darkness,
Then falling asleep,
Only awakening to rethink,
Long time ago, someone had said..
“Learn the art of accepting rather than always expecting”
Sadly, I am a slow learner…….
I could not,
And then, someone asked me,
“Learn to give others their space”
These are not the same person,
Nor am a member of FOSLA*
But yes, I am a slow learner…
My only folly is encroachment,
Into private spaces,
My only excuse (Reasons have long since ceased to exist)
I am moving into my own territory……
But yes,
I am not dumb….
I am not deaf……
And I can comprehend as well (Have cleared CAT only last year)
I promise you all,
And I mean to try hard,
No encroachments, rather no wandering into any territory,
Because
“Feelings are like a china cup,
Costly and rare,
Once broken, can be mended,
But the mark is always there”

Gruntlings of a Housewife

They call me housewife…
Legally and otherwise, I can’t have a wife ( I am straight)
and I deny any claim over house as well.
What an irony..
I am devoid of the very things my name is made up of..
And this is my story.
My husband earns in millions, but I yearn for him.
My son is abroad, leaving no stone unturned to surpass his dad in earning big bucks..
And here am I,
a prisoner in my villa……
But people think, I am so lucky..
When I am alone, I don’t think about my son or daughter,
What I think of is the open verandah, and the mango orchard…
The pleasure is unforgettable..
They ask me routinely,
What ails you??????
And they compliment me in the same go….
You are so lucky……
I don’t know how to put it across,
Think of a bird,
Give it water in a golden bowl,
Supplement with best food available….
It will not be happy,
Because that comes at the cost of its lifeline,
The ability to fly, which has been marauded by the merciless world..
I am that very bird,
I have all the amenities, but my heart pains,
Because none of them can see my tears,
Forget the vain attempt to wipe..

Pleadings of a lawyer

 

My Honor (Though that has been replaced, but old habits die hard).
I hereby swear that whatever i will utter will be true and nothing else.
I became a lawyer, because…….
I appeared in Medical Exams for three times, could not get through,
Tried my hands at Engineering also, but it turned out not to be my cup of tea..
So, what else, tried out this route…..
and succeeded.
Today, I am successful.
My clients include the same people I wanted to emulate once upon a time…
A doctor charged with selling patients’ organs,
An engineer caught red handed while taking bribe…
And not only that,
The beauty of my work is that I know before hand when
THERE IS GOING TO BE A SCAM..
THERE IS GOING TO BE A MURDER
THERE IS GOING TO BE A CHANGE IN POWER……
Because, before all of them, people flock for getting anticipatory bail….
Some claim me to be DEVIL’S ADVOCATE..
Yes I am, because today Devils rule the roost..
And the innocent look into the endless horizons of misery
( I had already sworn, I will speak the truth)